A wise person once told
me: "drugs are the devil on earth."
I'm inclined to agree. Drugs lead to terrible consequences and create a lot of suffering for both the person with addiction and those who are close to the person.
It's common that relatives blame themselves for the person's addiction, which may easily lead to self-accusations and self-hate. What many people do is trying to find the “error” or the “fault”, either in the whole situation, in the other person, or in oneself.
Try to avoid this type of “troubleshooting”. The disease of addiction is a complex disorder that often depends on many factors and situations. All factors combined lead to the person making destructive choices (choices that probably felt positive for the person in the beginning), which then lead to an addiction.
So it's not worth finding "faults" and “errors”. Instead, try and find a solid ground to stand on. Find situations, places, feelings and thoughts that make you feel safe. Try avoiding taking big, decisive decisions whenever possible. If you instead would turn his thoughts to show your compassion and important decisions if possible.
I'm inclined to agree. Drugs lead to terrible consequences and create a lot of suffering for both the person with addiction and those who are close to the person.
It's common that relatives blame themselves for the person's addiction, which may easily lead to self-accusations and self-hate. What many people do is trying to find the “error” or the “fault”, either in the whole situation, in the other person, or in oneself.
Try to avoid this type of “troubleshooting”. The disease of addiction is a complex disorder that often depends on many factors and situations. All factors combined lead to the person making destructive choices (choices that probably felt positive for the person in the beginning), which then lead to an addiction.
So it's not worth finding "faults" and “errors”. Instead, try and find a solid ground to stand on. Find situations, places, feelings and thoughts that make you feel safe. Try avoiding taking big, decisive decisions whenever possible. If you instead would turn his thoughts to show your compassion and important decisions if possible.
What are you in
need of right now? A reliable friend? A warm bed? A little food in
your stomach? A cup of tea? Write something in a journal? A nap? To cry for a while?
Give yourself that. Right now.
Give yourself that. Right now.
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